Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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One day a object is flying overhead in a city and a man in a crowd of pedestrians yells, "It's a bird!" another man yells, "It's a plane!" No one else says anything as they stare at the two men that had become so excited about a possibly seeing a bird or an airplane.

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I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

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Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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Dig a big hole in your front yard and wait next to it so when people walk by they'll ask "Why is there a hole in your front yard?" to whcih you will reply "I don't know. Do you wanna play Monopoly?"

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Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no hands. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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We found a cure for cancer. Death

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

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Why was the kid picking his nose. Because someone shoved a bomb in it.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

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What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

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TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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Why was the muslim surprised? A tyrannosaurus rex bit off his legs.

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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