Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there" "BOO" "BOO WHO" "No it's just BOO"

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Why is Helen Keller Blind and Deaf? Because she can't drive!... oh no wait I screwed that up.

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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KENNAH CAMPIONS LAUGH

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

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Why didn't the giraffe go to the zoo party? He didn't receive an invitation.

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

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How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

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what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

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Pianos.

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Bob Saget

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Q. How did the blind man cross the road A. By an abmulance which took him to the hospital because his first attempt to cross was unsuccessful and the hospital was conventeintly located on the other side of the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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