Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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You will never see the a heaven made of pure light with no room for darkness to dwell? Pure light will make you blind, living forever in darkness.

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What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

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What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

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how do you make abus driver cry? you rip his limbs off.

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How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna ride bikes?

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Q. what did the kid say to his foreign language teacher about the test? A: i dont understand this test, its like in a complete different language

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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How many women does it take to arrange my new Ethan Allen furniture? Just one, I was told it was divorce present. She took it with her.

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

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What did the man want for his birthday? Chicken dinner serves 2-3 people

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How do you say cabbage in Spanish? You don't.

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

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i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

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While your reading this. A man is robbing your home and sodomizing your dog

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What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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