The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

what is white on top and black on the bottom? Society

Two guys went into a bar and started drinking. After sometime one guy said to the other, "I love your mother.I want to marry her." The other guy said,"Come on dad,you have been drinking too much."

do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

How do you get rid of black elephants? Arrest it for being black.

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

Why isn't Michael Jackson aloud at Disney world? He is dead.

Hey

Your mom went to college

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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