Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

Velcro. What a rip off.

White NBA players.

How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

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Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

A black man walks into a convienent store, pays for his stuff and leaves

A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

A priest, a paedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. And that's just the first guy

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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