roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

A boy with red hair is happy.

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

Why do so many black people like watermelon? The same reason so many white people, do. Have you had that stuff, it's really good!

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

Ill never forget the last phone conversation i had with my Jewish friend before he died due to the 9/11 incident. Friend:owejpq3jhp3qjopiqwejhriopjhaiophfioashiohwih13ioh3f2893hoiqehefioahfioahisdpahdfajdfopasjiopdfajdfopsajradalkdjakldja;hdfkl;adhlpa;dhfakl;dhkladhkadhlkhdjklahdjkgsdjkgbdqwgy3bi3grqbhgjkasjkdkasjdgjkadgskajgdkajdsgjkasgdad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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