Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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what does a human and a bucket of red paint have in common? . . Both are not tigers

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What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

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Why did the little boy fall down the steps? Because he wasn't a very stable person.

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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What was so special about Anna Frank's diary? Nothing. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

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French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

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What did the Chinese man say to the Japanese man Nothing as they have never met

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops