A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

In Kentucky...your grandmother rapes you.

Q. Why did the chick go to KFC? A. To visit his mother

what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

Yo momma so fat she's obese.

Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

what do u get when you cross a monkey, a sock and wheels? A: a sock monkey. I was kidding about the wheels

Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

whats more serious than rape the holocaust

Why did the elephant fall out of the tree Because the post man threw a fridge at it

Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

you know whats better than lemonade? sex

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...