Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I've often heard that a room with a million monkeys with a million typewriters, given enough time; would eventually reproduce the complete works of Shakespeare. This seems to suggest that if something has an extremely low chance of happening, it will still eventually happen if enough attempts are made. However, I feel that the aforementioned scenario, given enough time to play out, would only result in a room full of dead monkeys. Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didn't the boy eat chocolate yesterday Because he was allergic.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the cow jump over the moon? To see outer space

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a turkey? Just a sort of mixed bird thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A muslim walks through a medal detector before the entrance of the airport terminal. The alarm goes off and he is arrested by TSA officials, they open his jacket and find 30lbs of high explosives.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't go to you anyways.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock Who's there? a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops