when life gives you lemons your like wait how did i get these lemons??

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roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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What did the cookie monster eat? Food

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

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Why was Jimmy upset? There is a frog taped to his face.

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how do u make a baby cry? you shouldnt. Stop thinking of ways to make a kid cry... asshole.

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so a man walks into a bar *pint of bud there please

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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What did the Chinese man say to the Japanese man Nothing as they have never met

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

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French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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Terraria

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Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

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A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

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Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops