How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

Kade was sad. He had finally got a girlfriend when he realized he actually liked men.

Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

what's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings what's worse than 2 bee stings? the Holocaust. what's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings

You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

How do you cheer up a sad caterpillar? KILL IT WITH FIRE

Q: why did the boy walk into the woods alone? A: nobody knows he hasn't come out yet

whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

Why was the little boy sad? He was recently molested.

What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

Why did samba hurt her head? Because she fell out of her mum muff

why cant fat people walk because they are fat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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