-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

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Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

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How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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What did the boy say 9+9 was? The Holocaust

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why did the clown go to the graveyard? because he was dead

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Math Quiz! If sally was born on September 18th, 1997, how old will she be on her birthday? Leave your answers on her grave tomorrow.

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

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Why did the boy yawn? Because he was tired.

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

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There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

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Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops