A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

world peace

What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

Who do you call when you see a ghost on the street? GHOSTBUSTERS!!!! no, ghostbusters are not real, you call the police

A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

What is Rebecca Blacks favorite resurant? T.G.I Fridays...

person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

The Awkward moment when the world doesn't end

Yo mamma's so fat, we are all seriously concerned for her health.

What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn! What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck! What starts with S and ends with EX? Spandex!

What's worse than chicken pox? AIDs.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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