What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

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What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

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A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

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Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete jumped out, who was left? Pete, the boat blew up and instantly killed repeat

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

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whos the most unprodutive person ever not hitler her helped over populatin and got rid of the jew they multiply like jews anyways

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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What did the chicken say to the butcher? Moo.

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Jews are a religious group. Boy scouts are a group of boys who enjoy camping and other outdoor activities.

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What did the dancing amphibious landing craft say to the carrot faced caterpillar? wanna get in its cold

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If John had eight apples and he eats three. Calculate the mass of the sun.

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

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Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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