why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

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Bitch! Love, J.B.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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Can God do anything even if it's impossible? Yes. Can God make a rock so heavy he can't lift it? Yes. Can he lift that rock? Yes. Then he just failed at making a rock so heavy he can't lift it

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What's brown and sticky? A Mexicans underwear.

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What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

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How Do You Fart Eat Beans

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I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

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What did a lot of money say? I FEEL LIKE A MILLION BUCKS!!!!!

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How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

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You know what really pisses me off? When I drink too much coffee.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Why did the maid clean the house? Because that's her job, ya moron.

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

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Q: What happened when Johnny cheated on his test? A: He got a higher score

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What's worse than the holocost? 6 Million Jews

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What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

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What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

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A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

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What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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