What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

You may notice something very odd about this paragraph. There is something strange although you can't figure it out. It is boggling your mind and keeping it from thinking of the real purpose of this paragraph. It is like an enigma in an enigma in an enigma in an enigma. Stop thinking hard and think inside Da Box. I just wasted your valuable time although it's not really valuable if your looking at this website.

Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

A boy and a girl are each granted a wish Girl: I want us to be lovers until the end of the world Boy: I want the world to end

What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

What do you call it, when a jew makes fun of a black guy? Racism.

Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

What's a good joke? Not this one.

What do you get when you come across a duck and a moose? Nothing...What do you think you deserve a prize or something?

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The three of them discuss theology for quite some time and then begin approach various patrons with invites to attend their respective Sunday services.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

How many mathematicians does it take to count?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

Okay I have knock knock joke but u have to start it. Okay Knock knock Who's there (akward silence)

You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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