wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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Ily bae

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Anyone can post anything.

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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Why did they call the woman crazy? because she drowned her children in a lake.

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? Still a pilot.

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How did the boy get a bruise? His mum threw a fridge at him! How did the boy get a big graise? He got mulched! Why did the boy get molested? Because he was naked in Mr. Molestogiacomo's house!

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you look closely, it's not a chicken, it's a man wearing a costume. He's going to a halloween party with some friends. Sally was not invited.

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If an aeroplane falls from 15,000 feet in the air and crashes into and orphanage is it possible that no-one will get hurt? No,the aeroplane will destroy the orphange hurting the property value.

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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If you'd turn to page 43 you will find the homework. Have a good weekend!

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Whats funnier than a barrel full of dead babies? two barrels full of dead babies.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver comes into the bar and gulps down the guys drink and the guy starts crying the lorry driver says "dont cry ill buy you another" thee guy sas "it's not that today i woke up late for work and when i got there i got fired and then when i went to go home feeling depressed my car doesnt startand so i walk home and i find my wife in bed with the gardener and so i came here to die but you drank my poison"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know either, i'm just wondering why a chicken is trying to cross the road!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops