Roses are red Violets are blue Wrong. Violets should be purple.

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

When the tsunami hit in 2004, christians worldwide prayed for the victims. it didnt help

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

Q: what's red, green and goes over 100 miles per hour? A: a frog in a blender

Why did the homosexual cross the road without looking both ways? He was blind......

if you spell clever backwards you get a mixture of letters that don't make sense

What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

Why did the little boy tell his classmates jokes? To try and fit in for once.

whats black and strange a paki

What do you call 1,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

What did Tom get for his 5th Birthday ? Nothing, he died when he was 2 years old

Why did the deer cross the road? The overpopulation of man has caused an expansion of construction into the habitat of the deer and it has required him to occasionally frequent human populated areas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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