Q: knok knok A: Im home

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

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Why did the frog cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Whats a hobbo's favorite food? Trash

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

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what long green and bumpy? a pickle

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Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

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what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

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yo mommas so fat she heard it was chilly out so she ran inside and got a bowl

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender!

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

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The awkward moment when Delilah got hit by a bus.

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Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised that they are in the presence of a celebrity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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