Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

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How do you kill a black man? You cn coz he'll beat you up first

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q: Why doesn't the young lady speak very much? A: Because she's a whore

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Transgenders! More than meets the eye! Transgenders! Girl was once a guy! LGBTs wage the battle to destroy The homophobic forces of Christianity! Transgenders! Homos in disguise!

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how did harry styles get in one diretion god

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I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

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Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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