A seal walks into a club.

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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What is it called when a black guy gets robed A crime

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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It is true that Trump will make America great again.

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I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

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Uh... What was emulating again?

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The Princess is in another castle

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Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

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Why did little Timmy fall down? Because he was shot in the head.

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Why do pokemon have hair? because they have no balls

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Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

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Knock Knock .... Knock Knock .... Pum Pum Pum .... LAPD! open the door!

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Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

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Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

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Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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