Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

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Invention I totally meant invention! XD, now okay, you can have the top comment, ill even read it because I like ya a lot.

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Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Roses are blue Colton is gay

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Jennifer walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender's name was Steven. His friend's sister who was my cousin's ex wife has the same name as the girl Jennifer. That's what I heard.

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LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

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What is better than getting a job? Getting a better job.

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

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Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

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kk

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Why did the black guy buy a bucket of KFC? Because he was hungry

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She didn't have a dog.

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Nerve endings. Now, lets say we make that sensation of a finger down there vibrate, as your nose (not not your lower parts no no) become twenty times as sensitive, now you are just rubbing your nose right? Try not rubbing it completely off now...

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

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Kim Jong Un thinks that he is in shape. And when you think about it, he's right. Round is a shape.

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who likes to gets to get fisted A) sock puppets

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everyone wonders y grandmas dont wear bra's its because if youre that old u might die putting it on

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? this overused joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops