How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

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How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

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CHAD'S A FAG!!!

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what did the guy say when his partner took a poop on his chest? It was unnecessary for you to deficate onto my chest. In no way at all was that sexually stimulating, and i shall consider seeking out a new partner.

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An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

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Why did the little boy tell his classmates jokes? To try and fit in for once.

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A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

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Why did the baby fall out of the trees? Cause it was dead.

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Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

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What happens when you forget your parachute as you jump out of a plane? You wake up.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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