How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What's a fun thing to do on a plane? Make a bolt to the pilot, smash his brains in with a iron pipe and make the plane plummet a few hundred feet with a maniacal laugh until you wake up from your dream and scream at your mother to wipe you.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a banana? Banana's don't hijack planes.

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

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Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

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This would be racist to black people if they could read.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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How do you get Pikachu onto a bus? You ask him politely.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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The next sentence is true. The last sentence was a lie.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops