Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock .... Knock Knock .... Pum Pum Pum .... LAPD! open the door!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Uh... What was emulating again?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did little Timmy fall down? Because he was shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The Princess is in another castle

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do pokemon have hair? because they have no balls

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man visits his doctor for an annual checkup. "Doc, I feel great! I'm running 5 miles a day, I just got promoted at work, and sex with my wife has never been better!" A few weeks later, his doctor calls him in. When he arrives, the doctor looks at him grimly. "I have some bad news. You have lung cancer." "But how? I don't smoke. My wife doesn't smoke. I have never felt better." The doctor pats him on the back, reassuringly. "This may be true, but you still have lung cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Shoot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

thumb_up thumb_down +1

spell backwards: taco cat

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ryan O'Sullivan likes to suck his own penis. - Ryan O'Sullivan.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two crabs are standing on a wall. One of them falls down. The second one's name is Georges.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

rose's are red violets are blue bernard is mine and yours too if you hurt him in any way i'll punch you in your face and make you gay Krissc

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops