Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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Why did the 18 year old girl take her clothes off? To take a shower

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What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

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Jackie Chan walks into a bar.

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how are a ferrari and a pile of dead babies similar? neither are good to have in your garage when the police come.

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how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

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Rose are red, I dont give a shit. When I think of you, I play with my clit. :)

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What kind of Mexican makes no money? A Mexican without a job.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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What do you get when you cross a train track and a bumpy feild, Further along on your GPS map.

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What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Everyone in the bar is very happy for him considering he has regained the ability to walk

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How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

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A Jew walks into a furnace.. The bartender says "What'll you have?" The Jew wonders why there is a bartender in this furnace, then they die.

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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What has eyes but cannot see? A blind man.

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What do you call a kite that doesn't fly. A broken kite.

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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A few people were put in a room with 5 doors and 4 were a certain death one was freedom and they had to choose a door to go in not knowing which was freedom the first person went in the door on the far left. He got raped by Michael Jackson. The second guy opened the door on the far right. He got in a room entirely made of ice cream. He ate all of it and got such a brain freeze his brain froze. The third and final guy turned around and noticed a door labeled exit. He exited the room and continued his life as a normal person

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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