Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

the midget went to the midget store

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

Why did the blonde throw her alarm clock out the window? Because it was broken.

A mormon walks into a bar.

What's worse than being a Packer fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... Oh, wait...

I walk into a bar...

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

What's the difference between Obama and a monkey? They are two different species, so thus they are very different.

When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

A blonde walks into a bar; she orders and enjoys her drink and then leaves with her thirst quenched.

What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A Coffin.

Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

What's puby and dandruffy? Aodhan Hearty

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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