Why couldn't a little kid turn around in a hall? He has a spear in his back.

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A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

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Kameron Brown is gay.

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Tim likes girls

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How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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Why did the priest fall onto the alter boy? Because he lost his balance

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What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

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Q:Why did the old man die? A:Because he had Cancer in his hole body.

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Where did little susie go during the explosion? Everywhere :) What color were her eyes? Blue. One blew this way and one blew the other way. :p Knock, knock Who's there? Not susie :)

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Penis chickens

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How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

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A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

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fallow me on twitter #ieatveloceraptorsfordinner

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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What do you call a man who kills others for his own amusement? A psychologist

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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