Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

su algato es en fuego

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A woman walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, my water just broke." The doctor replies "Get off my carpet."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

It's gone. It's all gone. There's nothing left.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Half life 3 confirmed

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -8

U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why can't Ray Charles see? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A fat African a rich mexican and a gay guy jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The gay guy because fat Africans and rich Mexicans don't exist

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a banana? A banana.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, violets are blue, you are my slave, get back to work!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a sheep? something to have sex with.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops