How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

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why did the little boy start to cry? because his parents didn't love him

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender in five states.

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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White NBA players.

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Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

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Michael Brown

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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Why did the blonde kid that was really gay He got a bad case of HIV

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

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Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

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What did the Rabbi say to the priest? The holocaust was real and it tore apart my family.

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Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

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What do you call an elephant and a rhino mixed? Ahellifiknow.

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What happens when you search andreas' mum in google? You are redirected to man porn

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a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

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Why was the boy running There was a giraffe chasing him

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A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

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what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

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Doctor! Doctor! There is a fly in my soup! Moral: Huh?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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