A man walks into a bar. The bartender lights him on fire.

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what do you call a black man in the dark? missing.

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why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't he got ran over half way.

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Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

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(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Whats worse than Justin Bieber's love life. My ass crack.

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whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

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Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

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who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn't be able to count them if it were dark.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

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How much is that doggy in the window? It's not for sale....it's waiting to be euthanized.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

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whoever just posted that stupid yo mama crap answer my comment

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Why did the mathematician go to jail? Because he killed his wife.

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Why did the Egg turn Purple Because it didnt turn blue.

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A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

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How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb? None. They are blind and do not care if it is light or dark in their surroundings.

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Where does the Queen of England live? England.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

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Like this if you have a big diick like me Dislike if you have a baby diick Ignore if you're a girl and get back in the kitchen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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