What does a black car thief do with a stolen car? Drive it

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Whats worse than getting in an arrow in the side of your neck Finding out there is a gas bill tied to it

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what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

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well use a tissue!

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What's funnier than 3 midgets in a treehouse? A talented comedian.

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A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

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What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

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once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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Do you like cheese? Yes. Okay.

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What's Worse Than World War I 2 World War I's

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What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

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Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

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Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

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My two friends Larry and Paul are both race horses. They were getting ready for a big race to quolify them for the Kentucky durby. BANG! The race started! What. Close race! First it was Larry then Paul then Larry then Paul! And finally Larry came out and won it! Paul went to the winners circle and congratulated Larry. He said "hey great job Larry but next time after you come back from touring will you let me win?" Larry says "oh! Of course this couldn't get between us! We're like two peas in a pod. Closer then bread in a basket. We're best friends"... So when he came back from touring Larry said it was great! And promised let Paul win. BANG the race started! It was Paul then Larry then Paul then Larry won again. Paul was a little mad that he he didn't win but he went to congratulate larry anyway. Larry said next time he was deffinetly going to let Paul win, because he wasn't gonna let this get between them because they are two peas in a pod. Closer then bread in a basket, they are best friends. Then after Larry came back from touring he promised again he would let Paul win. BANG! The race started and it was Paul then Larry! Then Paul! Larry! Paul! Then larry won. Paul at this point furious went to the winners circle. He talked to Larry "Larry why didn't you let me win for the third time!? This is just your ego trying to win every time now!?" I didn't want them to fight so I chimed in "Larry, Paul! Please don't fight! Your two peas in a pod! Closer then bread in a basket! Your best friends!! You don't want to fight like this!" Larry turned to Paul and said "Hey look! A talking dog!"

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with an alligator? Go take some acid and find out for yourself

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? She had no Arms or legs Knock knock Whos there? Not Sally XD XD XD XD XD XD XD

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how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

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Dont read this joke

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im gay

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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Why wasn't the Asian at work? Because the sweat shop was closed on Sundays...

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Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops