Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

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What do you call the black guy with a gun a ski mask on? Tyrone, because thats his name.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Hit her over the head with a baseball bat until she has concussion

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

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A man and his friend are talking. The man says, "You know what's funny? Sometimes you mean to say one thing and you say a completely different thing. Like the other day I wanted to buy a ticket to pittsburgh, but the lady I was buying it from had very large breasts, so I accidentally said 'Can I have a picket to titsburgh?'" And the other guy says, "Yeah, man, it's really funny you say that, the other day I meant to ask my wife to pass the salt, and I said 'you whore, you ruined my life'"

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There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

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roses are red violets are pink your nanas in the cowfeild with a bottle of stink... not really shes long gone.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby?... a dead baby dressed as a clown whats funnier than that?... A pile of dead babies dreesed as clowns Whats funnier than that?... that the baby in the bottom of the pile is alive.

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I really don't like Holocaust jokes. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off of a guard tower.

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One's fun to smash and the other is a watermelon.

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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So FDR walks into a bar.

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for christmas? Cancer.

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A small boy is playing on the sidewalk. Then, he is approached by a black van. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away. Then, the man driving the van says, "So, how was your day, son?"

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How do you make a black plumber cry? - kill his whole family

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

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Wait a moment, I will see what I can do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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