Kys

What do you get when you cross a man, with Alzheimers disease?

What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? About 4:30, unless he's running late, stuck in traffic, had to get gas.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the farmer let him out, and he found a road to cross!

Why couldn't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has parkinsons and therefore couldn't keep his hand steady.

What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

A blind man walks into a wall.

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Released some juice and burst its skin.

Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

What is white and can fly? A fridge that can't fly.

What did the asian do with his homework? finish it. as is expected from children his age.

A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

I once saw my grandparents making love.. that's why I dont eat raisens

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...