60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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You mean I have to type in this little box? That's so embarrassing!

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Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

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What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

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A blind man watches TV

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" *giggles* friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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If this becomes top-viewed I will post more milk related jokes

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What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

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What did the father say to his son? ....nothing

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Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

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Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

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why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

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What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

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What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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