A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

why are tree's green cause that's how god made it

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks, as he saw the first two men previously walking into it, and it looks like it rather hurt.

What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

Racial equality.

A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

George Bush.

What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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