What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

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So there's this moose right? And he walks into the store and asks where the potatoes are. And the cashier lady says aisle 5. So the moose walks to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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A black man walks into a bar. He sits down and has a couple drinks. When he is finished, he generously tips the bartender and walks out.

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Crime doesn't pay. Sure it does

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What happened to the lion which escaped from the zoo? It was successfully recaptured.

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Do you know why the kid jumped down the 50 foot hole? I dont know, jump in and ask him.

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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Q.what happens if a fat man see's a black man? A. the fat man eats the black man thinking that he was chocolate

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm not a? poet microwave

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A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

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What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Why was Junior sad? His parents were killed in a car crash.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

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Knock, Knock Who's There A dyslexic kid with aides

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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whos district champs not JM

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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