What did John look at when Meghan Fox took off her shirt? her undershirt

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Want to hear a joke? So do I.

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Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

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Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

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What Do You Call A Black Guy Surrounded By Nine White Guys With Bats? Jackie Robinson.

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What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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What do you call a black guy driving an airplane? A pilot

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Why did the little boy commit suicide? Because his dad molested him.

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Paul was mowing his lawn when he felt a bump. It turned out it was a bunny. Paul felt bad but the bunny felt worse

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

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A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Everything's brown Who shit on my flowers

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How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

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What's good? Anything that is not bad.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops