What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happens if you an 3ft size olive, a glob of red paint and rainbow colored glue on a table and rub your arm in it? You get olive, red paint and glue on your arm.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It probably saw an animal that it wanted to chase, or a person carrying food, or another dog that it wanted to make friends with.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are brown, violets are brown, someone keeps shitting in my garden

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What computer sings the best? A Dell? No a Mac, because they are the superior computer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the girl fall off the swing ? because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Radical thinkers have decided to end abortion they will begin to kill everyone who has an abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's long, brown, and runs across a family's backward? A fence.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

thumb_up thumb_down -6

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human being and one is an inanimate object that people enjoy sitting on.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

we asked cheryl cole what she would do if it was the last day on earth she replied.. id probably spend all the time with my family. wrong cheryl youd spend your last day on earth running away from other people wanting to accomplish their last day on earth dreams

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops