A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

Your moms so ugly, that when i took her out to eat for dinner we built an everlasting relationship. Thats why you call me dad.

What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

A Muslim, a Buddhist, and a Christian are on a plain. They have to jump off for some reason. The Muslim straps a bomb to his chest, jumps out of the plain, and screams "AHLA AKBAH"!!!! The Buddhist jumps out and says save me heavenly Buddha. A giant golden hand catches him and lightly places him on land. The Christian says "aw hell with this" and jumps out, then says "save me heavenly Buddha". The giant golden hand places him down gently on land. The Christian then says "thank god". The giant golden hand comes back down and kills him.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to probably balance himself.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

Your mama so stupid She has a 3rd grade education

What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

Why was Little Bobby sad? He just superglued Uranus to his forehead.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? eating the worm causing it to breed inside of your body later causing them to eat you internally

What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

Why didn't Susie's dad come home on time? He was dragged into a dark alley, then stabbed in the eye. When his body was found 2 days later, Susie couldnt stand the loss and hung herself the day after her father was found.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

I'm going to Re-write History... History

why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? A Holocaust. What's worse than a Holocaust? 3 bee stings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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