Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the four friends drive past the bar? To see if it was too crowded to go into or not.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Aww good to see you looking positive! He said to the boy dying of HIV

thumb_up thumb_down +13

so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a black man is chasing a white man,, "sir you dropped your wallet'!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Being raped with a cheese grater.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

NEVER

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Committing Suicide #YOLO

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the cookie monster eat? Food

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops