Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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A man was walking down the street He was then killed in a drive by.

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Thats what she said

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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Why do black people like watermelons so much? They don't. It's just a stereotype.

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how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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Your mother is so fat, that she was instructed by her doctor to go on a low carbohydrate, high protein diet to reduce the risk of heart disease later in life.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken saw some potential food across the street.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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This sentence is a lie.

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Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar she took the back seat

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops