A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

thumb_up thumb_down +15

knock knock Person A: who's there Person A: oh shit that was me

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than finding a worm in ur Apple? Finding a worm in ur poop

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's faker than a rich mexican? A unicorn smoking weed

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Are you gay. No. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the arm-less Ben fall off the swing? Gravity

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Nothing. The lawyer is sterile and can never have children.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops