Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did one dinosaur say to the other? "rawr"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

High school is like forced anal sex, Hard, painful, and you cry your hopes and dreams at the end of it all.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why did the girl cross the road? to get away from you

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT GAY! But my boyfriend is. Love you, Jeff.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A Black man walks into a gay bar. He has a great time because he is perfectly content with his sexuality.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

So a man walks into a hospital to see his dying wife..... walks into her room falls over and then dies

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

mark is religion

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops