010010101210001010 You dirty girl

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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How do you get 500 babies into one bathtub? a blender. How do you get them out? NACHOOOS

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theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

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hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

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My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

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"Hey hey hey, did you hear the joke about the guy with terminal cancer?" "No." "Sorry to break it to you then."

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Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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why did the woman commit suicide? because 2+2=4

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Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

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How long does it take a blonde to skrew in a light bulb? Any amount of time; given that she knows that said bulb is in need of replace meant, or that said blonde is disabled, or if you thought I would make some kind of funny blonde joke that you would tell your friend and then forget ten minutes later, only to think of it a day later and claim it as your own.

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a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

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Bee1:Boo Bee2:Boo Look i found 2 boobies:)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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How do you get a baby out of the blender? Pour it

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Why didn't the Country club waiter enjoy iced tea? He's simply always had a preference for warm beverages. He assumes this goes back to his infant days when his mother would massage his belly with warm porridge.

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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