Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why is my lawn red? Because i forgot to tell my neighbor's children to move

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Mum makes $97 per hour working online? Offline I can see , but online, mmm pull the other one, it plays lossless codecs

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is the #1 cause of pedophiles? Sexy children

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's funnier than the holocaust? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she didn't have any arms

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Olympic gold-medalist lose his faith in God? Because he began to feel that the the reasoning that most religions were based on was fairly spurious.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Holocaust jokes are not funny. And I don't see the humor behind them.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats worse than seeing a child with autism? Seeing a child doin' serious damage in a mosh pit

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops