What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

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What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

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Wats rong with yo leg.....

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What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

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Your mommas so dumb she had to climb a glass wall to see what was on the other side! But the glass was slippy so she never saw what was on the other side.

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Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

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What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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What do you can a Brazilian woman wearing a bikini? It depends on the case, but usually Brazilian women are named "Maria", "Ana", "Júlia" and many others kinds of names, with their root being hispanic, portguese and latin lenguages. Respectively, the names quoted have the English translation being "Mary", for Maria, "Anne", for Ana, and July, for Júlia.

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i told my parents that i was having friends come over my dad said great my mom said great so i said great

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What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

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What happen to the girl that received chocolate on Valentine's day? She had a allergic reaction.

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Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

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hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

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What time is it when you should go to the dentist? About ten minutes before whatever happens to be the time of your appointment.

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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An Asian person drove home safely.

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who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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Why does beyonce sing "to the left to the left?" cause women have no rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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