Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a disease, it's called cancer.

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A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance abuse, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life, and was appalled by his bad decisions.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A woman has sex with an Asian man, then a white man, and then a black man. She chooses to be in a relationship with the black man because he is prepared for the responsibilities of a relationship and the other two men, though both are well endowed, are not ready.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

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what has genitial warts? me

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What did the cow say to the horse? Mooo

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What did the gay black man say after JFK was shot? Wow thats really sad but I have such an appetite right now so i should probably go to eat.

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Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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Death by kayak

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What did hitler give his granddaughter? A gas bill.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

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Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

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what do you call a black lawyer? a very well educated black man

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

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How do you stop your baby crawling in circles? Pick it up and smother it.

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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