A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

Why was the curious black guy a good Lumberjack? He was always axin'.

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

there once was a black man who played basketball

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

Jerry Sandusky prefers twenty eight year olds. 20 eight year olds.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

How do you get someone to shut up? Shove a fork down their throat and hang them by thier thumbs

People spending hours typing nothing but cus words? Who does that?

What's funny to laugh at dying? JEWS!

what is orange and blue 2 colors

What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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