How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

Why did the black man have sex with the white woman? Because they were married.

Lewis

all the kids had fun

Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

what happened to the man who is standing in the rain? he got wet

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

Q:what is a wheelchairs biggest fear A: steps

What's worth than a large pile of dead babies? Nothing, you sick freak.

What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

Caitlin Jenner has a mangina.

Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...