What's worse than finding half of a worm in an apple? a razorblade.

Harold Camping and the May 21st 2011 rapture.....

Do you smell that? Sex and candy?

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

What does an Irishman say to you in the morning? Nothing because you only speak French.

haha

Get on the boat.

A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and then the mushroom walks out.

How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

Q:what's faster than a black man with you t.v A:his brother with your laptop

there are 2 men standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is called Peter

Why is six scared of seven? Because seven is in his house with an axe.

How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

What did the guy say before he learned how to Dougie? Teach me how to Dougie

Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

No Nero, you see, a great man once told me that happiness is not something you look for and eventually find, but something that you decide that you already are.

What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

Why couldn't he play piano? Because he is an untalented piece of shit.

A blind woman was watching tv. think about it

Thank you for flying Buzzy Fly Airlines. Today we'll be flying around Uranus.

Why didn't the women make her husband a sandwitch? Because she was struck by a car as a young child and was told she could never walk again. Her family couldn't afford a wheelchair so therefore she is bedridden all day.

Why are anti jokes so funny? Because they are not

Black guy something something. Anti-racist punchline.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...