What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock, Knock? Who's There? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what long green and bumpy? a pickle

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

There was a black person running down my street. He was celebrating because he just graduated from Harvard University.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the goat say to the zebra? Nothing. Goats can't speak

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Jane: The house is supposedly worth $ 6 million Jack: No way! The figure is made up.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

One night, a heartbroken magician named Jeff went to a bar. Jeff met a nice girl, and they talked and laughed together for hours. After a while, Jeff asked her, "do you want to see a magic trick?" She ate his wiener.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops